Ask the Expert: Ex and I Disagree on Video Games
One mom feels torn between her parenting instincts and her ex-husband.
My 14 year old son purchased the rated “M” video game "Grand
Theft Auto" when he was staying with his dad last weekend. I feel that
this game is completely wrong and have confiscated it. When I
questioned his father (my ex), he felt that there was no problem with
it. There’s more…
Since it has been opened, they cannot
get a full refund. I think that my ex needs to pay my son back for his
purchase. Maybe next time he will think before he allows my son to buy
anything he needs an adult to purchase! Help!
You articulated in a very clear manner how you feel about the
game and how you don’t think it’s appropriate for your son. You don’t
have to apologize for that stance.
This is clearly an issue between you and your son’s father
and your son doesn’t need to be caught up in the middle of it.
Co-parenting has so many unique issues and it involves a constant check
of your intentions and emotions - not an easy task.
Here’s what I would do. First of all, try and take all of
your judgment and anger out of the equation. They aren’t helpful. Tell
your ex that you are not ok with this purchase and your son won’t be
allowed to play the game at your house. Let the two of them work out
the money situation. You don’t need to be involved in it at all. Ebay
is always an option for opened games, as is Game Stop or any number of
places that trade games or buy used ones.
Be matter of fact about it without taking any of it
personally and you’ll get much better results. But no matter what the
results are, you do have the last word as to what you are and what you
are not comfortable with in your home.
Hope this helps!