Share Your Story: C.J.--an Amazon.com review
Tuesday, April 24, 2012

A review of The Self-Centered Marriage

I originally read ScreamFree Parenting shortly after it was released years ago and shortly after the birth of my second child. Since then it has been "the" parenting book for me, meaning it's been the catalyst to stop buying other parenting books, because it really did change the way I looked at parenting. What I loved about it, though, was that it also helped me look at all my relationships- including my marriage- in a new light. So, I'd already started to internalize some of the principles and apply them to my marriage, with pretty decent results. I was excited to see The Self-Centered Marriage (formerly titled ScreamFree Marriage) because I thought that I might already know what was coming. I was both wrong and right.

The Self-Centered Marriage takes the ScreamFree philosophy to a new level. Just the simple fact that it directly addresses the common "fires" that couples face in relationships is a great start. I loved how each fire (time, extended family, household management, sex) is explored, because in so doing, he normalizes the tough times that couples face. The way that he explains these common issues will help readers see that their marriages aren't necessarily "bad" because they've hit rough spots in their marriages over them. Additionally, he addresses how these issues provide areas for us to grow in our relationships, and that if we face the issues with the support of the Calming Down, Growing Up, and Getting Closer structure underlying our interactions, we're going to not only get through the tough times, but come out truly more connected. And the best part is that I always feel so much "healthier" and stronger when I "do conflict" in a ScreamFree fashion. I feel like I'm not only getting stronger, I'm also learning more about myself, finding ways to deal with the common, normal difficult issues couples face, and still end up closer to my husband, and- for me, a great added bonus - modeling healthy relationships for my kids.

I also have recommended it to friends, and every one of them has loved it and wanted to discuss it!

C.J.--an amazon.com review

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